What Does This All Mean?

I knew my body didn't feel right.  I wanted to take naps all the time and when I did, I would nap for 3 hours.  But it was so hard to tell what was causing my fatigue, joint pain and muscular aches.  My father passed in April 2010, I had a very busy work schedule, I had moved back to the 2nd flr apt of my parents home to be closer to my mom and help her through the loss of my dad, I wasn't working out as much as I used to, I had a loss of appetite, I lost muscle mass (my ass is non-existent!) and I was ALWAYS TIRED!  That's all normal right?!

I started to notice the fatigue increase around October 2010.  I started noticing bilateral hip and knee pain.  It would take me 3 days to recover after a night of dancing.  And if you know me, my dancing requires total body movement!

Then December 2010 I had intense chest pain!  WTF, am I having a heart attack?!  Noooooo! My PCP was out of town so her office said go to the ER.  I really didn't want to but my boss convinced me to.  "You are a healthy, young girl!  It was probably anxiety".  Ok.  Thanks NW for charging me loads of money to tell me that ;)

I was still having weird intermittent chest pains.  My body ached all the time.  I would roll out of bed and feel like an 80 year old.  It would take me 10 minutes to get moving and the thought of hitting the stairs in the morning...HELL NO!  I would look around to make sure my neighbors weren't looking because I was so embarrassed how I looked going down the stairs in the morning.  It was time for my physical!

So I went to see Dr. O in Feb 2011 for my physical and mentioned all my symptoms.  She just said "you were an athlete, your body took a beating, it's just catching up now". Riiiiggghhht!  We took some basic labs and everything was normal.  I get a message from her that my blood work was perfect.  It's so hard being perfect...JUST KIDDING!  On a side note, I notice a small red bump on my left shin.  I showed it to Dr. O and she said just keep an eye on it.   Which I did...

Come March, the bump on my shin looked bigger.  I went to see a foot doctor who said I had a subdermal infection and treated me with antibiotics.  6 days later my ankle blew up..I had freaking CELLULITIS!  Seriously?! Seriously!  I thought I picked it up from working a high school wrestling meet because we all know how nasty wrestlers are... eeeeeeekkkk!

I went back to my PCP to close out the case of cellullitis.  It's all good!
"But wait Dr. O, I mentioned last time I have a lot of joint pain and am experiencing fatigue." 
"I don't see that in my notes Noreen and I take excellent notes.  You didn't mention it"
"No, I know I did."
"Well I don't have any record of you mentioning it"
(WTF - she made me so mad)
After a 5 minute debate, I simply asked her to check for Rheumatoid Arthritis.  She said it doesn't run in my family so she didn't think I have it but we will check for Lupus, Lymes and RA.

Ok, if you know anything about Arabs, they will never see a doctor! So who knows if it runs in my family because my family would never get something checked out!

Anyway,  a week later I get a VM..."Hey Noreen, it's Dr. O.  I've got your lab work here and you don't have Lupus and Lymes but surprisingly your numbers for RA are elevated. I want you to see a Rheumatologist.  I will have their office call you"

Ok, now we are moving towards some answers.


April- I see Dr. H, my rheumatologist.  Super sweet lady!  She does her exam and looks at my lab work and says "now I'm not convinced you have RA but there is something systemic going on.  Let's take some more tests and take x-rays of the joints that are bothering you and we will follow up in a month."

May 5 2011- I see Dr. H. She says she still is not sure after review my bloodwork.  My sed rate (red blood cell test that shows inflammation in the blood) is still elevated.  But I failed to mention to you my lovely readers, I have noticed MORE BUMPS on both shins now and both ankles are swollen.   So I show Dr. H the bumps and right away she said "I think this is Erythma Nodusum which can be linked to Sarcoidoisis"...Huh?!..."let's take a chest xray because we may find some enlarged lymph nodes."  Okey-Dokey

May 6 2011- "Hey Noreen, your chest xrays are abnormal- I want you to get a CT scan of your chest."

May 9 2011- So I am getting my CT scan.  They shoot the meds in, intense pain shoots to my chest and I feel like I am peeing in my pants.  I sit up and tell the nurse I don't feel right and then I throw up.   Ugh! 


So I leave my appointment and then walk over to our Northwestern office.  I have a meeting with a new hire to go over what I have been working on in our market.  I get a phone call at 11 am..."Hey Noreen, it's Dr. H.  I have your results from your CT scan and there is a lymphoma in your chest.  I think we may be dealing with a blood cancer such as Lymphoma or Leukemia. I need you to see a Thoracic surgeon."

I lost it! I am balling by the treadmill at work.  I ask my boss to come by me.  I'm balling in the bathroom now saying  "I don't know what this means?  What is happening to me? What does this all mean?" over and over again.

Bless my boss because she dropped everything she was doing and calmed me down and called over to the hospital to get my next appointment sorted out.  Thanks KB!

May 10 2011- The elevator stopped at the 21st floor and I see "Lurie Comprehensive Cancer Center".  The thoughts in my head "Wow!  Welcome to cancer! This is crazy, I don't have cancer". My dear friends Ali and Amy went with me to meet Dr. D, the chief of Thoracic surgery.  We were put in a consultation room.  I was a bit anxious and began to rummage through the room.  Next thing you know I put in Three Men and a Little Baby ...VHS!  Then, a doogie howser resident walked in and took my history.   He had very small hands.  Then Dr. D walked in and he says,
" This ism't fair, you look so healthy"
"Are you telling me I have cancer?"

...then he goes on explaining the golf size mass (5 cm-non-bulky) in my chest located in the anterior mediastinum (where the lungs meet) and starts explaining surgery, biopsy, lymphoma, thymoma, sarcoidosis.  He is pretty sure we are dealing with Lymphoma and needs to find out if its Hodgkins or non-Hodgkins.   He says the word chemotherapy and I start crying.  This is not happening to me right now!  Next step, PET scan and surgery!