My heart. The big muscle that is supposed pump blood throughout my whole body. Well, not mine. I am very frustrated and upset about it. And today is monumental for me. It’s my 6th round of chemo. My halfway point. I am receiving messages from friends and family this morning of encouragement and excitement. So grateful for all of you. But back to this little ticker of mine.
I had my follow up echo and cardiologist appointment last week. Last night, I got the final word on the plan for my treatment. Dr. R spoke to Dr. Gordon and they have decided to put me on heart meds for at least year (Coreg) and continue taking the Zinecard along with my chemo treatments. My echo had the same findings as my first echo before treatment started. 40-45% ejection fraction which is below normal. Normal is 50-60%. The ejection fraction (EF) is the measurement of how much blood is being pumped with every heart beat. My Left Ventricle is mildly depressed and my cardiologist would say. My Right Ventricle is normal. Since I am receiving chemo this puts my heart at risk. Hence why they give me Zinecard to protect it. Now my EF didn’t drop which is good but it didn’t get better. My doctors were hoping that the disease/cancer in the area around my heart was causing my EF to be low. But since I have no more cancer and the echo still showed the same findings. The doctors are still not sure what is causing my EF to be low. We have done several tests already and nothing has provided an answer. Dr. R thinks a virus may have caused this. That I was sick for so long and didn’t even know and that viruses are known to attack the heart. She said if my EF stays at 45% the rest of my life, I will be just fine. BUT, since I am going through Adrimyacin (one of the chemo drugs) I may lose 20% of my EF at some point in my life. When? It could be right away or 50 years from now. There is no real way to tell when the EF will decrease. But we monitor and try to prevent that decrease is muscle strength. If it drops I am at risk of heart failure. I am seriously frustrated. I have been a healthy eater (most of the time), a non-smoker, not a big drinker, an athlete the majority of my life, a good student, heck I got all A’s in grad school! Why me? What else can go wrong now? Why is it one thing after another?
I don’t want to feel this way but I can’t help it. My friends help me find meaning in this. I am grateful I now know about my heart. If it wasn’t for cancer I would have no clue. I am a tough girl. I beat cancer. And I can get through this. I have to keep my mind strong and positive. I am thankful for medicine. It is healing me and it will protect my heart and my health. I am lucky to be living and to have insurance and to have a wonderful medical team at Northwestern and to have all of my friends and family. I just want this year to end and move on to normalcy.
A little Robyn for you, with every heartbeat! I will go dance right now and feel every heart beat, feel my heart pumping, and feel alive.
We have shares of good and bad news in our life , the more u receive of one of them the less will for next periods .. there are alot of unexplained and unpredictable issues with chemotherapy , it depends of the drugs and their doses, and on the response of the body, u can work on the latter though .. keep it up .. u've finished the hard part so far .
ReplyDeleteI've finished my 6th cycle (12th round) of chemo today, and will be doing the PET scan next two weeks .. wait for me "remissioner" and survivor . :)
yzn, what's the word? are you clear?
ReplyDeleteHey there .. how sweet of u asking and remembering .. u r an angel .. I did the PET Scan last week .. Thank God .. it is clean .. the mass is still present but not active .. i will be having a month of radiation then montioring.
ReplyDeleteHope everything is going well with u .. We are taking this hodgkins down my friend .. Cheers.